June 29, 2005
Happy Birthday, Mr. President
Now that I'm thirty-five, I'd like to officially announce my candidacy for the U.S. presidency in 2008. I want to be really careful not to violate any campaign finance laws, however, so whatever you do, don't send money. Instead, buy yourself something nice, then put it where you'll see it come election day three-and-a-half years from now, and then vote your conscience. Till then I'll be busy picking out presidential china patterns.
If you'd like to apply for a cabinet position, feel free to post a comment. I'm open to creating new cabinet positions once I'm the leader of the free world, so use your imagination.
Posted by Dave Zimmerman
at June 29, 2005 12:25 PM
How about Secretary of the Vibe? :) I'd put up my name for Secretary of Blogs, but I think someone else may get it.
Ooh, I like that. "Secretary of the Vibe" would look mighty cool on a business card; I might be happier as "Undersecretary of the Vibe" than as president, come to think of it: All the perks of working for the Vibe department, but the buck stops with your boss.
The cabinet position "Secretary of Blogs," contrary to public opinion, remains unfilled.
I'll be Chief of Modern Psychopathologies (Seeing that I've been published in this area.) Happy Birthday Dave! It was great connecting with you the other week. Let's do lunch soon!
This is shaping up to be a pretty funky cabinet. I still don't have a drug czar though. Any takers?
At this point I feel I should acknowledge that a friend of mine is also running for president in 2008, and he began his campaign twenty years ago, so I suspect his warchest is a bit weightier than mine.
What you'll really need is a Frog Wrangler. I do have some experience in this area
A rain of frogs could really throw the Vibe out of kilter. I also hate to think of the Anxiety and Social Impacts that the Chief of Modern Psychopathologies would be struggling with. I can wait for other members of the Cabinet to approve the position - but consider that if you take too long I may be tempted to defect to join The Man, The Myth, The Dude in 08.
"No frogs were harmed during the wrangling in this film."
I'm all for frog wrangling, but a cabinet position?!? Seems like this would fall under the bailiwick of the Secretary of the Interior. Although, if a rain of frogs is a clear and present danger, I'd move quickly to wrangle your appointment through the Congress. Frankly, I don't think you'd get the same offer from the man, the myth, the dude.
Am I that friend that you're referring to a few posts ago? I was planning to run for the Oval Office off of name recognition alone...
Hmmm. Now you've got me worried about fitting a square peg into an oval hole. No disrespect intended, of course; Square Pegs was a great show.
I can't believe you'd run against me, though. We shared a locker! That's got to count for something . . .
Come to think of it, my sister-in-law just faced an identically delicate relational dilemma. She's president of a local Parents Who Care group, and someone else wanted to be president too. So Becky wisely said, "You can be co-president." She's like King Solomon, that one . . .
By the way--Steve, if you're still reading these posts, Chris (the man, the myth, the dude) says hi to you and, to me, "You're going down!"