IVP - Strangely Dim - Limerick-ick-ick-ick-ick-ick

The best I can d,o knowing only one employee:

There once was a pair from a 'burb.
Both worked with a group so superb.
With kids cute as can be
And a "u" for an "ee"
Fans must queue for miles from their curb.

(Perhaps to adopt damaged books? Or to bring gifts for the whole office?! Who knows...)

For Joel, on the announcement of his departure:

There once was a editor named Joel
Who left his poor friends with a hole.
He said, “I’m going away,
And I have no more to say.”
And now they all call him a troll.

We once had a friend called Scandrett
Whose presence none soon will forget.
His office is hollow
He’ll be gone on the morrow
But really we’re not too upset.

(Ha ha! Just kidding Joel - you know you’ll be missed dearly!)

That's right, ladies and gentlemen. IVP Academic is losing one of its beloved editors and accepting applications for a replacement. Here's the unofficial announcement:

IVP has an open position
that's because of employee attrition.
If you've once dissertated--
bad spelling you've hated--
please send your employment submission!

There once was an org: IVP
That I loved much as an employee.
But time came for a change
Even though it felt strange
To leave that most fair company.

It's the friends I've made that I'll miss most
Dave, Lisa, even Jim Sire's ghost!
They're such great folks, you see
And mean so much to me
Even when they do set me to roast.

I am so bad at limericks, but here goes:

Ashleigh has an IVP obsession,
Reading IVP books by the dozen.
She's a book geek and blogger
She's headed to Fuller
We call her the IVP super-fan!

But, lo, an obsession more crazed
Took over each month's first of days
And so saying rabbit
Became quite a habit
Outsiders are vexed by their ways.

(Despite my obvious defensiveness/accusing others of penchants for much more ridiculous things, I am mostly proud to be an IVP Super-Fan. It IS embarrassing on occasion: for ex, when I go into full-out IVP marketing mode on my friends. But, thankfully, they usually give me some grace since they like your books, too. :o)

That might be the best one yet, Ashleigh.

If only you were giving books away for prizes...